Dear Evan.

Wow.  I didn't think this post would be a hard one.  I figured I would sit down, blog about your special day (on the 31st), post a few pictures and go to bed.  So not true.  As soon as I wrote the title tears started flowing.  Make fun of me if you want.  Silly mom, so sentimental.  Anyway.  My little tiny.  Happy Birthday!!  I cannot believe that you are now one year old!  It really seems like just yesterday when the doctor told me I could take you home and I secretly wished for one more day in the hospital because I had no idea what I was doing.  To be honest, I still don't know what I am doing, but we are figuring it out.  You, me, and dad.  We are figuring it out.  Lucky for us, you are a content little guy.  You curl your little lips in, smile, and take in the world.  You still cannot talk, but you make sure to let us know how you are feeling.  When you LOVE things, you kick your feet.  Really fast.  True kicks of joy.  We see this a lot.  For example, when dad comes home from work - feet kick.  When we get yogurt out of the fridge - feet kick.  Cheese - yep.  You kick your feet when you see your cousins or your grandpas.  Kiki.  Your blankets.  Camel back water bottles. Mac and Cheese from Red Robin.  The animal farm book with animals hiding behind little doors.  Your little white polar bear hand puppet.  Squirrels.  Dogs.  Trees.  You still use your binky and I love to see your little smile hiding behind it.  You have an awesome smile. 

On the other hand, when you HATE something, you are getting pretty good at letting us know.  You refuse to do things that you don't want to do.  For example, Vegetables.  Yes, imagine my stress. How on earth am I supposed to be ok with you eating nothing but cheese?!  I guess I can rest assured that you really are my son, however that doesn't make me feel better about your nutrition!

You are crawling all over the house and are into everything.  You are starting to try to stand by yourself, but are still a little unsure of your feet.  I am confident it will come soon enough.

You are saying a few words.  Da Da,  Ma Ma and something that sounds like "E" "I" "E" "I" "O".  I keep encouraging you to say other things, but for the most part our conversations go like this:  Me: "Evan, can you say Jennifer?"  You:  "Da Da."  Me: What about "Kiki?"  You: "Da Da."  Me: "Okay, try Grandma."  You: "Da Da."  Maybe they sound different to you and I just need to listen a little better.

You are my best little friend and I am so lucky to be your mom.  Seriously.  Everyday - lucky.  Thank you for being awesome.  Thank you for being patient with me.  Thank you for giving tight little baby hugs.  Thank you for messing up the kitchen/living room/dining room/bedroom and teaching me to be okay with it.  Thank you for stealing dad's ipod every once in a while and stressing him out.  Thank you for reaching for things that are out of your reach and making little hand gestures to get what you want.  Thank you for laughing when we put a blanket over our heads.  Thank you for helping me get you dressed by pushing your little hand into your shirt and for helping me get you out of your carseat by taking your arms out of the shoulder straps.  I love that.  Thank you for loving music, for falling asleep on your dad, and for loving animals.  Thank you for coloring pictures with pens and for crawling around with a glue stick while I work.  Thank you for loving the remote control, and for climbing into your mini chair all alone.  I couldn't believe that!  Thank you for walking under the table and for always seeming happy to see me when I poke my head under there. 

Thank you for being one.  I love you so much and cannot wait to see what the next year brings.  Happy Birthday!!